The recent events surrounding scientology have actually prompted me to create one more blog entry on this old blog. This dangerous cult is under attack by anonymous, and I'm doing my part by fiddling with the results turned in by that greatest of all search engines. Here's one more link to a fantastic project.
Cheers!
-Jeff
As a quick note to the uninitiated: A "captcha" is an image with distorted text in it. Your job is to take the distorted text, figure out what it says, then jot it down. Many websites use them to figure out if the "user" using them is a human or a programmer-created bot. See wikipedia's captcha entry for more info.
I came up with the idea for this story after battling the captcha system at Digg. Without further ado:
Jeff and the Captcha
Jeff went out abroad one day, dark deeds upon his mind.
He ventured to an unusual site, to see what he could find.
Shovel in hand, a curious plan, to Digg his very own site.
The deed, he thought, would be e'sly done,
and traffic would abound.
Until he finished of his work,
and heard that awful sound.
Hello. My name is Jeff. I am, relatively speaking, a pretty moral guy; I don't lie, I don't steal, and I don't scam people. I treat other humans with respect, and do my best not to make life harder for them. I barely even cheat in video games. However, according to US law, I should be a felon.
Why, you ask? Because I play DVDs, listen to music on my portable audio device, occasionally want to print out an e-book, have installed windows, and print numbers in blog articles.
Mein Gott, I'm a monster.
Here are a few basic signs that it might be time to go outside for some fresh air.
You become very, very confused when pressing the "tab" key does not fill in the rest of what you were typing.
The phrase "man mount" does not strike you as particularly odd.
|-|3Y D00D0RZ!! \/\/31Come 7o mY bl4rg!!!111 That was leet-speak, an advanced form of Webanese. In this short article, you too can learn to speak it! We'll start with an example english sentence, and gradually translate it into Webanese.
Example: "When I saw that funny cat sitting next to you, I laughed a little, but when I saw the other picture, I laughed so hard that I fell off my chair, injured myself, and had to take a quick trip to the emergency room."
C'mon, D00d0Rz, 137's 5t4rt!!1
Are you curious about Linux? Or perhaps just plain tired of Windows? I have composed a comprehensive*** list of the differences found between Microsoft Windows and Linux. While I've taken a humorous bent on several of the entries, each comparison is essentially true, particularly the bit about the Developers' cats. Tell me what you think!
My name is Jeff, and I'm a faller. And I'm not talking about your average, everyday, social falling; I'm hardcore. From the time I learned to walk I've been dropping, stubbing, stumbling, spilling, slipping, tripping, tumbling, trundling, faceplanting, taking long walks off short embankments, doing high-speed introductions between my face and the ground, and just plain falling.
Naturally, I've become rather good at it.
For those who've always wanted to fall, but could never quite get the hang of it, this is the article for you. Herein, I reveal all the secrets of plummeting, plunging, diving for the dirt...
Well, you get the idea.
Ok, so you know grep, awk and sed. You can ls and cd your way anywhere on your computer. You can even eject your cdrom by typing several letters instead of pressing one button. But here's a fresh*,new**, and perhaps even slightly humorous take on several of your all time favorites.
How does linux stack up to its competitors? Here are three different comparisons that seek to answer this question: Linux VS Your cat, Linux VS Your Grandmother, and Linux VS The Soviet Union. Who wins? I'll leave that up to you.
Wake up. This is a critical step, and its importance cannot be overstated. Failing to wake up before writing a blog article can result in articles such as this one. Waking up should take no longer than an hour. If it does, consider investing in a louder alarm clock.
